An Oklahoma woman who opted to forego chemotherapy to treat her head and neck cancer for fear that it would harm her unborn child, died just days after the baby girl was born.

NewsOK.com is reporting that Stacie Crimm, who was told years ago by doctors that she could never conceive, was overjoyed when she learned, at age 41, that she was pregnant. The single mother-to-be sent more than 100 joyful text messages to her brother, Ray Phillips, in those early days.

But her joy was not to last long.

Phillips remembers that it wasn’t long after Stacie learned the wonderful news that she began to experience severe headaches, double vision and unexplained tremors. He started to receive more alarming text messages from his sister, saying things like “I’m worried about this baby,” “I hope I live long enough to have this baby,” and “Bubba, if anything happens to me, you take this child.”

A visit to the doctor resulted in a CT scan that revealed Stacie had head and neck cancer. She was told to decide between having the chemotherapy that could possibly save her life – or the baby who could not survive the harsh treatments. Stacie agonized for some time, but eventually opted to forego the chemo with the hopes of being able to finally hold a healthy baby in her arms.

Her health continued to decline, and on August 16, she collapsed in her home and had to be rushed to OU Medical Center in Oklahoma City. Doctors found that the invasive tumor had begun to wrap around her brain stem and was slowing squeezing the life out of her.

Another crisis two days later resulted in the baby’s heart rate plummeting and Stacie going into cardiac arrest. Hospital staff resuscitate her and rushed her into surgery where they delivered a two pound baby girl, named Dottie Mae Crimm, by C-section.

The baby was placed into neonatal intensive care while her mother fought for her life in a separate building.

“Sister was dying right there,” Phillips said. “She was gasping. The human body fights death.”

But Stacie’s will was so strong she managed to recover from the episode and within a few days, was off the ventilation and sedation.

“There was still a lot of hope at that point,” said Phillips wife, Jennifer, to NewsOK.

Doctors put together an aggressive treatment plan for Stacie that they felt gave her at least a small chance of surviving.

“The cancer was such that it had crossed one of her eyes and destroyed the muscle behind her eye. It paralyzed her throat. When she did talk, she was hard to understand. As far as her mind, she was there,” Phillips said.

But her recovery was not to last very long. She frequently lost consciousness and wasn’t even able to sign Dottie’s birth certificate. Because Stacie would not name the father of the child, Phillips was given guardianship of Dottie who he and Jennifer promised to raise with their own four children.

On Sept. 8, Stacie once again stopped breathing and had to be resuscitated. Doctors warned the family that she was dying.

It was at this time that a determined nurse and mother named Agi Beo decided it wasn’t fair that Stacie had not yet held the baby whose life she had chosen above her own.

“She was in the last stage with the brain tumor. And she never got to see the baby,” Beo said. “This baby was everything she had in this world.”

Together with another nurse, Jetsy Jacob, they made special arrangements to have Dottie Mae placed in a special capsule-like ICU and transported her to her mother’s bedside. Because Stacie was unconscious at the time, they waited for her to rouse and when she did, her brother asked if she would like to hold Dottie that day. He said Stacie’s eyes popped open and she raised her hands as if to ask where the baby was.

Moments later, nurses wheeled Dottie Mae into the room and carefully lifted the baby from the incubator. They placed her on Stacie’s chest where mother and child could gaze long and deeply into each other’s eyes, which they did for several moments.

There wasn’t a dry eye in the room as they watched this beautiful encounter between a woman and the baby she was willing to die for.

Three days later, Stacie Crimm was dead.

Just last week, Ray Phillips fulfilled his last promise to his sister and brought home a healthy five-pound Dottie Mae who will be raised alongside her four new siblings.

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