Two lesbians who bear the distinction of being one of the first couples to wed after New York’s Marriage Equality Act took effect last summer are calling it quits, which puts them on the road to becoming the state’s first divorced gay couple.
The New York Daily News is reporting that Katie Marks, 29, and her partner, Dese’Rae Stage, also 29, were married in a “pop up chapel” in Central Park on July 30 last year, six days after the state’s same-sex marriage law went into effect. However, by February, their relationship was on the skids.
According to Stage, the trouble started when she discovered suspicious e-mails between Marks and another woman. The two attempted to work things out, but when she learned that Marks had gone to visit the woman, who is now her girlfriend, she knew the relationship was over.
The Atlantic Wire reports that Des responded by posting what was happening between her and Marks on Twitter, Instagram, and Facebook, posts that sometimes included talk about the new women she was seeing. “All the stuff that came out publicly, on social media, I don’t regret it,” Stage told the Wire’s Jen Doll. “I was feeling vindictive. I knew her family would sweep [the breakup] under the rug. Was it immature or unkind, yes, but I don’t regret it.”
Now, Des says, “I’m trying to find the most loving way to get us through this practically — divorce paperwork, credit card bills — and personally — with the hope of maybe someday being able to carry on a friendship — but I do believe we never should have been anything more than friends.”
The two have no assets and no children, which makes things a little easier. “The only thing we have to deal with is $10,000 worth of debt in preparations for a big wedding celebration we planned in Boston over Memorial Day weekend,” Stage said.
“I never thought I would have the ability to get married, so when I chose my forever, I meant forever. In a lot of cases, straight people accept divorce as a possibility. It never entered my vocabulary.”
The divorce papers will be filed tomorrow. “I do feel very much like the president of the loneliest club in the world,” said Stage on her blog. “How many gay divorcees do you know? It’s a horrible feeling to go through this huge life upheaval without the support of others who know exactly what you’re feeling.”
Same-sex couples, particularly males, are notorious for the short duration of their relationships, whether married or not, and with six states now allowing these marriages, Stage won’t be lonely for long.
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