By Susan Brinkmann, OCDS
Staff Journalist
Researchers have found that loneliness spreads among friends and family as easily as a cold or the flu.
According to a new study published in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, researchers at the University of Chicago, the University of California-San Diego and Harvard have found that lonely people “transmit” or “infect” others with the same feelings of isolation.
“Loneliness spreads across time,” John Cacioppo, a neuroscientist and psychologist at the University of Chicago and one of the authors of the study, told MSNBC. “It travels through people. Instead of a germ, it’s transmitted through our behaviors.”
The longitudinal study interviewed more than 5,000 people over the course of 10 years, tracking friendship histories and reports of loneliness. Researchers found that lonely individuals tend to move to the fringes of life where they have fewer and fewer friends, but before they do, they transmit their feelings of loneliness onto their remaining friends. These friends then become lonely and pass their feelings off to others, thus perpetuating the cycle.
“When people get lonely, they’re more likely to interact negatively with others they encounter,” says Cacioppo. “If you have two neighbors and they’re friends and one becomes lonely, they’ll start to treat the other less friendly. Ultimately, they’re less likely to be friends.”
Loneliness can also make a person feel more anxious and shy. Previous studies have also shown that loneliness can be harmful to both mental and physical health leading to depression, high blood pressure, increases in the stress hormone cortisol, and compromised immunity.
It can also make people less trustful of others and can make the brain more “defensive,” Cacioppo says.
“Your brain tells you people are rejecting you,” he says. “Loneliness may warp the message that you’re hearing.”
However, it’s important to note that even though loneliness is “contagious,” it’s not a disease. It’s a biological reaction, much like hunger or thirst or pain.
“Society tends to think of it as an individual characteristic — there are just loners,” he says. “But that’s the wrong conception of what loneliness is. It’s a biological signal motivating us to correct something that we need for genetic survival. We need quality relationships. We don’t survive well on our own.”
But on-line socializing through sites such as Facebook and Twitter are no substitute for the real thing, Cacioppo says.
“If you’re isolated due to a disability or a spouse with Alzheimer’s, then Facebook can be a real boon,” says Cacioppo. “But if you’re spending your time on Facebook rather than face-to-face with friends, it increases your loneliness. It’s about quality. Lonely people use social networks as a substitute; non-lonely people use them to synergize the relationships they already have. The person with 4,000 friends on Facebook may well be a very lonely person.”
The secret to combating loneliness is to realize that it is nothing more than your body sending you a signal.
“All normal humans feel lonely at some point in time, just like they feel hunger and thirst and pain,” he says. “But while we have cupboards filled with food, taps for water and medications for pain, we don’t have anything comparable for loneliness. I’m not saying you need a cupboard full of friends, but if you feel lonely, pay attention and take the time to repair it.”
Because loneliness is associated with mental and physical diseases that can shorten life, Cacioppo said it is important for people to recognize loneliness and help those affected by it before they begin to isolate themselves from society.
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