New research by a therapist whose parents divorced when she was seven reveals that daughters often suffer more when parents split because of absentee fathers, self-esteem issues, and because they tend to take a break-up more personally than their male siblings.

Fox News is reporting on the new book, Daughter of Divorce: Overcome the Legacy of Your Parents’ Breakup and Enjoy a Happy, Long-Lasting Relationship, which is based on a survey of over 300 women who were raised by divorced parents.

Written by Terry Gaspard, a therapist, college instructor and author who specializes in divorce and its impact on families, she collaborated with her daughter in seeking answers to the question of why women seem to suffer greater negative impacts when raised by divorced parents.

For instance, children of divorced parents are twice as likely to divorce themselves – but for women the number is even higher – 60 percent.

Based on her own experience and that of the women surveyed, she discovered what she calls the “sleeper affect” which is a negative impact of divorce that hits people in young adulthood. In her case, she married young and remained in an unhappy marriage for 16 years because she was trying to avoid making the same mistakes as her parents.

Her daughter was similarly affected. As soon as she entered college, she rushed into tumultuous relationships which stemmed from abandonment, trust, and self-esteem issues – all of which are common in women whose parents divorced.

The romantic relationships of daughters also tend to suffer, which has a lot to do with the father/daughter relationship, which is why the divorce rate is higher for this demographic.

"Daughters tend to take things more personally. Psychologically, they define themselves more through their relationships," Gaspard said.

Girls also have a tendency to hang onto their memories which means both positive and negative experiences stay with them longer in life.

But Gaspard has found hope for daughters of divorce who are struggling to cope with their parents’ separation.

First, she sees a positive impact on daughters when parents are willing to co-parent their children after divorce. Remaining amicable and spending holidays and special occasions together also makes a big difference. Reaching out to divorce attorney services can help achieve a great co-parenting plan.

In cases of high-conflict divorces, she suggests “parallel parenting” where each parent gets the children an equal amount of time, but not at the same time, Amicable recommend online divorce where possible to avoid more conflict.

It’s also important that spouses “put on a happy face” around the children, regardless of hard feelings, and resist the urge to speak badly about an ex to the children. Always strive to “portray the other parent in a positive light,” she stressed.

Everyone involved in divorce should seek counseling, Gaspard recommends, because divorce is not “short-term” but stays with a person for a long time.

As for young women who became involved in a bad relationship and ended up divorced, take a long pause before remarrying. Gaspard recommends that the divorced wait at least four years before remarrying.

Before you take the leap a second time, "Deal with the fact that you may be afraid of being alone, but it’s better than being with a partner who is wrong for you."

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